As a kid I remember my parent’s friends changing as the season of life changed and I didn’t really understand it until I became an adult. The friends they had when I was really young weren’t the same group of friends they had when I graduated high school. And even now they aren’t completely the same.

I have found the same to be true in my own life. Very few of my friends from high school are still my friends. I can count them on one hand honestly. The same with my friends from college.

Those friends that we spent every weekend with prior to kids we see rarely if at all. Now my frequently called/text list is filled with hockey parents and the parents of my kids school friends. Because let’s face it kids consume our lives and I love every minute of it.

I think the biggest lesson I have learned in the last year is that we all change. For that I am extremely grateful! The people that I was too shy or not popular enough to talk to when I was in high school are some of my closest friends. I care less about others’ opinions of me which makes me more willing to talk to essentially anyone. I don’t really care what people think of the fact that most of my friends are guys! Not to say that I’m not friends with their girlfriends or wives but in a lot of cases I was friends with the guy first and will remain friends with the guy. The women that I am friends with are all truly amazing women who can hold their own in any room!

My circle has always been small. People you can really trust and count on are few and far between. If I’m being completely honest my family are my best friends they show up without asking when I need help. My kids know that their family is only ever a call away too.

My people, the ones that I truly let in have no season, they are just there. They are the ones that no matter how long it’s been the conversation picks up in the middle like we saw each other yesterday. They are the people that forgive my tantrums and know all my secrets and would never judge me for them. They don’t gossip or tell people my personal business.

In writing this article I realized I really need to take more pictures with my amazing friends because as I looked through my camera to find images for this article I realized. I’m not in any of the photos and haven’t been for years. So friends be warned 2021 will be filled with photos and actually being present instead of just hiding behind the camera!

Nov. 23 – What part of the day are you most thankful for?

Bedtime, that time between when the kids go to bed and actually fall to sleep and when I got to bed. The house is quiet and it’s time to reflect on the day

Nov. 24 – What is something nice someone did for you today that you are thankful for?

I am thankful for early morning phone messages to start my day off on the right foot. I’m also super thankful for people who rearranged their day to go pick up their beef directly from the butcher for me so that we can wait out test results.

Nov. 25 – List 3 things that always make you smile!

• Getting to talk to my nieces and nephews
• My kiddos when they are getting along
• Baby animals

Nov. 26 – What are you thankful for on this Thanksgiving Day?

I’m thankful for good food and getting to spend it with my parents and kids!

Nov. 27 – What season are you most grateful for and why?

I think this is a bit of a toss up for me….I love spring because it’s the season are renewal. I makes me feel like I’m starting with a clean slate. I also love fall because it’s the season of harvest and we get to take in the rewards of the hard work we have put into the farm for the year.

Nov. 28 – What does gratitude mean to you?

Taking time to be thankful what I have instead of focusing on the negative things!

Nov. 29 – What is a Thanksgiving memory that you are thankful for?

I’m most thankful for memories of Thanksgiving dinners with my Grandma and Grandpa Kachik. I can still hear my Grandpa telling the bear story year after year! The room I sit in to work daily is filled with so many memories of them. I wish my kids had gotten to meet my Grandpa and am so thankful for the years they got to spend with Grandma (aka Grammy)

Nov. 30 – If you had to choose just one thing to be thankful for, what would it be?

Without a doubt above everything else I am most thankful for my family! We may be loud and fight like crazy but at the end of the day they will always show up when I need them!

Nov. 15 – What is a small win you have had in the last 24 hours that has made you thankful?

I’m thankful that the cows loaded easily and that we traveled to Beaver Falls and back for our first hockey jamboree of the year without issue.

Nov. 16 – What quality in yourself are you most thankful for?

I’m most thankful for my work ethic. It has carried me far in my career and allows me to provide for my boys.

Nov. 17 – What is something about your job that you are grateful for

Technology is constantly changing forcing me to continue to learn every day.

Nov. 18 – What is something that was given to you than you are thankful for?

My grandma’s sewing machine. It currently doesn’t work and who knows if I will ever get it working again but I spent hours working at that machine with her. As much as we didn’t always see eye to eye the lessons that she and grandpa K taught me carry me thru many of life’s challenges. My love of quilts and cooking come from her.

Nov. 19 – What is a simple pleasure that you are grateful for?

I’m grateful for books lots and lots of books. I have always been a bit of a book worm and while I have moved to primarily digital books I still read a ton.

Nov. 20 – What is something you made recently that you are grateful for?

I’m thankful for the Christmas cards that I have been working on. They occupy my mind and hands at a time when I’m highly stressed and there is a lot going on that can completely derail my day.

Nov. 21 – List 5 things you love about your home.

• I’m the 3rd generation to live in my home so there are a ton of memories that make me feel close to those that have lived hear before me
• The kitchen is awesome and my favorite room in the house
• Not really the house but I love the land and fact that it allows us to raise a lot of our own food
• I love that as a kid it was always a place for friends to gather and nope that my kids friends feel the same way.
• To me it represents roots.

Nov. 8 – What childhood lesson are you thankful for?

I’m thankful that my parents taught me to work hard and not quit. It’s carried me far in life and my career. Also as often as I tell my mom I’m sick of being the bigger person, I’m glad that my parents taught us to be the bigger person and not stoop to others levels just do what we know is right.

Nov 9 – What is a change you have made in the last year that you are thankful for?

I’m thankful for the change in my career position. I feel like it has lowered my stress level considerably. The ability to do just the one job and not try to figure out how to fit coding in around that is a very nice change of pace.

Nov. 10 – What is something about your daily routine that you are thankful for?

I’m thankful for the texts and calls I receive every day to start my day.

Nov. 11 – Who is someone you are thankful for at work and why?

I’m thankful for Miss Angie who listens to my crazy meltdowns over random work stuff! Without her I would more than likely be fired because of my smart mouth!

Nov. 12 – What is today’s weather and what is something about it that makes you thankful?

I’m thankful for the sunshine so even though it’s chilly it’s still beautiful to work outside. All too soon the days won’t be so pretty.

Nov. 13 – What are 5 things you take for granted, which might not be available to other people?

• A roof over my head to keep me dry and warm
• Running water
• Electric
• Food in the freezer
• An amazing supportive family that loves me and my kids

Nov. 14 – What technology are you thankful for and why?

Facetime and Marco Polo that let me video chat with people. I’m a social person and since I work from home I often find myself missing adult interaction! You know talking about things besides Mindcraft, farts, and Pokemon! As a result I love being able to have conversations with people and see their faces on Facetime and Marco Polo. There are things that texting and phone calls just lack.

Nov 1 – Who is a friend that you are thankful for?

To protect my friends privacy I’m gonna leave out names here….

I have 4 very special friends that honestly without them I don’t know what I would do. They listen to my complain and freak out and whine and celebrate the wins with me. They are friends that I can pick up in the middle of a conversation and they keep up. 3 of them have been around for the last several years and they help me to be a better mom and reassure me when I feel like I’m failing.

The 4th came back into my life when I needed them the most. I didn’t realize I needed them but I did. It never fails to amaze me how things work out in life.

You all 4 know who you are! But I want to tell you again thank you for always being there for me and keeping me sane!

Nov 2nd – What accomplishment are you most thankful for in your life?

I’m thankful for my kids who made me a mommy. The struggle is real daily as I navigate today’s world to make sure that I’m raising good boys who will grow into good men.

I’m proud that completed college (something some said was a waste of my parents money for me to go) and staying with the same company for 13 years so far. I have grown from a entry level developer to a Product Owner those years and am confident in my knowledge!

Nov 3rd – What hobbies are you thankful for?

I’m thankful for my hobbies that get me outside and moving. They help refresh me! The kids love camping and honestly anything to get them off their electronics! It’s also awesome to be able to hook up the camper and head cross country to my brother’s place and still have my space that’s completely ours and I don’t have to worry how big a mess the kids make

And hunting has always brought my family together. I hope that is a tradition that carries forward into my kids generation.

Nov 4th – Describe a family tradition that you are thankful for.

I’m thankful for Sunday Night dinner! In today’s society where people are so busy it’s nice to take time and go have dinner with as much of my family as possible. My kids are learning the importance of family and togetherness as well as the people they can count on!

Years ago my Grandpa K started a Hunter of the Year award. It’s just a silly trophy that gets passed on every year to the person of the previous years choosing. This year I got to pass it on to the first kid in the next generation! This makes me extremely thankful for all the hunting trips with my grandpa, dad, great grandpa, brother, and sister. As well as my awesome grandma and my mom who take all the kids so we can hunt!

Nov 5th – Name a teacher or mentor that you are thankful for and why.

Mrs. Toth for letting me spend every spare min in the computer lab while in high school! And Prof. Bennett for his excitement about coding and the way he taught problem solving! Without both of them and other amazing professors at EUP I wouldn’t be nearly as successful in my career!

Nov 6th – What is something about where you live that you are thankful for?

I’m thankful that for most of my life the majority of my family has lived within 15-20 mins of me…. That meant that both sets of grandparents were always around and involved, my aunts and uncles were always showing up and helping out. We have always just worked as a group. And now I get to raise my kids here where Nana and Papa are a half mile away, they have great aunts and uncle and cousins close. We bridge the distance between Oh and Mt well! Oh and who can for get about Tia and Jason who are just as much family as anyone else!

Nov 7th – What is something you learned this week that you are thankful for?

I am constantly learning that people can and will always surprise you if you give them a chance to. Sure sometimes it won’t be in a good way but a lot more often they surprise you in great ways! They show up to help you just because, they change from who they were in high school, they step up when they don’t have to.

This has been a long hard year for most people myself included. I started the year with the intention to write in a gratitude journal daily as I was seriously struggling at the end of last year. I just pulled it out I made it a grand total of 22ish days. I can’t even say 22 days really since I skipped some along the way!

As I sit here and reflect on the year and all the changes that have taken place and the hurt and struggle that have been faced I am reminded that we need to see the good.

My sons need to see the good and learn to be grateful for the what the have instead of whining about what they don’t have!

For the month of November I am challenging myself to count my blessings daily! I will be posting daily gratitude prompts in my Healthy Living group on Facebook as well as weekly summaries here. Consider taking time to count your blessings with me in November!

This isn’t the sort of book that I normally read. I lean more toward romance and mystery novels. But after several people mentioned it I figure I could at least try it especially when it came up as free on Audible with a trial.

As an overview it identifies the 5 love languages as follows

• Physical touch
• Words of affirmation
• Quality time
• Receiving gifts
• Acts of service

It didn’t take me long to figure out the order of importance they fell into for me. Actually I automatically listed them in order of importance to me without actually thinking about it.

Prior to listening to this book I don’t think I ever really thought about what makes me feel loved and secure. And I’m sure that I never really thought to ask my partner what makes them feel loved.

If you don’t feel loved by your partner your relationship won’t last. So why is it that I never actually thought about that prior to listening to this book. It’s actually a really simple concept.

It doesn’t just apply to our romantic relationships either. I asked several people what they thought my primary love language was after explaining the 5 to them and 99% were like, “that’s easy, you like physical touch; you have always been touchy feely.“

Conversely, acts of service are just not my strong suit meaning doing things like making sure the kitchen table is cleared to make other people happy just makes me grumpy! In a days time the amount of stuff that I have to complete is a long list between the farm, my real job and the kids. If that alone isn’t enough then I just don’t have anything else to give in that department and I feel completely defeated and that what I am accomplishing isn’t enough.

I challenge everyone men and women alike to look at themselves and figure out how you would rank the love languages. If you are incapable of meeting someone’s needs because you suck at a specific language then that’s ok as long as you recognize it in yourself.

I have had anxiety issues for the last several years. I started having anxiety attacks in college. At the time I remember thinking, “This will pass. It’s just midterms or finals. Nothing a bowl full of ice cream or a bag of candy wouldn’t cure.”

Then came kids. I went a long time managing my anxiety without any help from medications. But let me tell you, raising two kids who are active social butterflies, while working a full time job, and running a farm/home is just, mentally exhausting! By the time the kids started school, I was finally ready to at least attempt meds to see if the anxiety could be better managed.

The meds worked for the most part, and life was good. Things didn’t slow down any at work or at home, but it was manageable. Yes, I still had bad days and situations that made me totally uncomfortable, but the reality is that the anxiety never totally goes away.

Then the pandemic hit and it’s a whole new level of hell. Wearing a mask is extremely difficult for me and it often induces panic attacks. I’ve had to walk out of more than one store and wait outside for my family. I have also just plain had to go home and either order online or try again another day.

Everyone is so busy judging everyone else these days, and debating the whole ‘masks vs no masks’ thing. Why can’t people just stop judging and go about their day? It doesn’t bother me one way or the other if someone else is wearing a mask and I’m not. Do I wear them when required? Yes, for as long as I can. Am I less likely to go somewhere that requires them? Most certainly because I don’t want to have to tell my kids we have to leave because Mommy is having a panic attack. The truth is, they can’t give me anything for the panic attacks because all the options will make me tired which is also a safety concern when I’m alone with the kids. If you see me out somewhere and I am unusually short with you, I apologize in advance, but the truth is I would rather not have a complete meltdown in public.

It’s that time of year when pumpkin patches are all the rage and all I see on my Facebook feed. We have gone to Irons Mill Farmstead for the last several years so when mom brought up taking the boys for a day this was my choice. However Mom had her own opinions and wanted to take them to Port Farms.

Thanks to COVID any outing requires research from me to find out what they are and aren’t allowing. Both sites stated masks were required but in talking to people who had recently been to both we were told that they were only really requiring them in the buildings and on stuff like the bounce pad.

At that point it really came down to price. Port Farms ended up being much cheaper and it’s closer. So that is what we went with.

Over all the two are very similar I can’t even really say that I like one more than the other. The kids were pretty bummed that there were no corn bins this year, but other than that they didn’t really voice an opinion one way or the other.

One annoying thing to note (and I’m pretty sure this was the same at both) is that they don’t accept cash anywhere but the main gate!

I can hear my grandparents telling me this in my head often these days. I remember being so mad every time they would say it to me. Not really getting the point. But now as I do hard things daily I remember those words and the lesson behind them.

I do things every day that I never thought I could or would do. I fix fences, split and stack firewood on my own (I’m gonna learn to cut it too but baby steps), I fix the washer and run the tractor (I finally stopped hitting things with it).

Not long ago I was helping my mom set up for a craft show we were hosting and I had gone and got some t-posts from TSC to put up a fence. As we were putting them in the ground mom goes, “How do you know how to do this?” I kinda laughed and said YouTube. We had bought the pounder at an auction for cheap and it’s probably one of my most used tools. I have t-posts holding fences in place in my orchard and they are holding my current greenhouse in place too.

There have been times when my dad says “Why don’t you do it this way?” I have to remind him that I am a girl and can’t always do things the way that he can but I’m still doing them just doing them my way.

I also find myself saying it to my kids when they tell me they can’t do something without even trying. I want my kids to always try and know that it’s ok to fail as long as you try. I want them to refuse to quit so I will keep telling them “Can’t died in the corn field.”

Farming is hard…..Raising kids is hard….Life in general is hard. But if you quit before you even start what do you gain?